Day 86: Montpellier Love Earrings

I'm feeling the love today, especially the constant care and attention from Robbie and my boys, but also family and friends from far and wide, so I reached for one of the special pairs earrings I still have in my collection. Robbie purchased these for me in Montpellier on a chilly New Year's Eve, 2008. They are inscribed with the the words Les belles histories d'amour - which appealed to us both. I always love wearing these, reminding me of our wonderful history together - one which I'm conscious keeps building day by day, especially through these tougher times.

Earring shopping, Montpellier

We were in the vicinity of Montpellier after a Christmas at Pauline and John's, followed by a few extra days spent at an apartment in Montsauve - a near by village, once owned by P&J, then purchased by Glasgow friends Laura and Alistair. We headed into this beautiful seaside town to collect some treats for our NYE dinner and do a spot of shopping. Of course I couldn't resist the bijouterie in one of the shopping laneways. As well as these earrings we came away with a lariat necklace for Ree's birthday, which is in January, just after we were arriving home.











There's a wonderful old fashioned carousel in the centre of Montpellier which the boys loved.

Ride em Gussie!

NY Day 2009, Montsauve

We spent a quiet NY day soaking up the winter sun in the gorgeous sunroom of the apartment - formerly an old silk factory - before packing up for our next adventure, a road trip to Barcelona via the French south coast.

Entrance to the Montsauve apartment

The boys at Collioure, 2 Jan 2009

En route to Barcelona we stopped for lunch at the stunning fishing village of Collioure, beloved by impressionist and fauve artists, for obvious reasons. These are such happy memories to transport me today!

Signac

Matisse

Day 86 and I'm feeling OK after a rough steroid infused night - I'm so pleased to have finished the dose today. I enjoyed a morning walk with the boys, then a quiet day at home. I headed off late afternoon for my neulasta injection to boost the white blood cell production. I hate the flu-like side effects of this drug, but its preferable to being at risk of a serious infection as I was last time. Rob met another craving, baking me a delicious lemon coconut drizzle cake today, which was absolutely delicious.

A brief visit from Steph this evening to collect her Swannies pass was a lovely distraction. My mouth is beginning to buzz - back to the trusty coconut oil. I'm hoping for a better sleep tonight. 

Day 85: Mum's Seed Pearls

Back to Chemoworld central today, and boy it was a busy place. With the Easter shutdown on Friday and Monday every step of the process today was crowded, starting with a long queue for blood tests when the doors opened at 8am this morning. Looking around the packed waiting room, and later the full clinic I was reminded again just how common and random cancer diagnoses are. I dashed in to join that queue, then home for a walk with Angus, Rob and Molly. After a couple hours at home and a nice Japanese lunch in Darlinghust with Robbie and James, Rob and I headed to the clinic for my 2pm infusion.

I had nurse Zoe looking after me today, who, like all the other nurses in the Kinghorn Centre was incredibly competent, but she was rushed off her feet with every chair filled. She set me up, and again with an easy port access and no sign of anaphylaxis (thank goodness!), she left me to it. Last time I had ice packs on my fingers, this time they had enough cold gloves to go around and oh my god they were freezing! I felt like my fingers were going to drop off.  I looked like I had grown clown hands.

I was feeling very tired though out the treatment today as I'd had a very disrupted sleep due to the steroids last night. After Robbie and I finished the crossword (I think I contributed 2 answers from my mushy brain!), I lay back listening to the latest podcast sensation S. Town, which kept me distracted. I've finished 2 episodes now and think it's wonderfully produced but does take some focus, and I'm not yet clear where it's heading.

Bringing me strength during my infusion today, I again wore a pair of Mum's earrings. These are a simple pair of seed pearls which she wore often, as have I since she gave them to me. I have a download of her last camera photos and have spied her wearing these on three special occasions - celebrating James' 9th birthday (her cakes were always so much better than mine), Gracie's 8th birthday, and spending precious days with Jai just after he was born. As ever, I missed her terribly today but it helped to be wearing the wonderful locket with the photo of us Meg sent me last week (it's hiding under my scarf in the photo), which did make her feel very close.


I was wearing these earrings in 2015 when I received a UNSW award for PhD supervision, after being nominated by my wonderful PhD students - Rose, Kavitha, Natalie and Emily and Sophie (missing from this photo). I've been so fortunate to have the opportunity to work with these clever and insightful women. On tough days like these, these fabulous people give me inspiration and excitement about the future - which I hope will involve working with them in different capacities, and watching them forge their own new paths and interests across a range of critical areas of gender justice.

Now I'm home I'm settling in for a quiet night. I'm feeling a bit battered about and trying to get into the right headspace to push on through what I expect will be a tough week or so. At least I know that I will bounce back, and am feeling so relieved I only have to endure 1 more infusion in three weeks time.

Day 84: Covent Garden Silver Cubes

On Hampstead Heath with C&B

Punching out the final edits on
Gendering Government

In 2002, Cazy and Ben generously hosted Robbie and I for a few months in their flat at Savernake Rd, Hampstead, while I was on sabbatical completing my first book and starting a new project investigating the introduction of the UK Human Rights Act. When we weren't out and about having fun, or visiting Pauline and John, I was writing at the flat or digging through the archives at the British Library. Rob spent his time walking London - including with me from home to the Library, which entailed meandering through Regents Park, still one of our favourite places in that great city. The flat was across the road from Hampstead Heath which we had a walk in almost every day. It was a wonderful time.

Happy Hour I, Savernake Rd

Happy Hour II, w Eilee and Bridgie

We joined a large contingent of extended family living in London at the time. During this period Aunty Eilee (Day 29) and Gerry were also based there for 12 months while Gerry undertook his Masters in Law, and cousins Katie K (Day 3) and her sister Brigid and partner Andrew were also in residence. Paulie Chap (Day 63) came to visit. We'd all get together from time to time, which was a lovely treat when we were all so far from home. Eilee and Gerry came across for Happy Hour at Savernake Rd a few times; Eilee always with a jar of peanuts and some Barcardi and Coke in hand!

Deep in discussion
with Gerry Kelly about Richard Dworkin

Welcoming Paulie with an Absinthe cocktail -
it transpires it's not a good jet lag cure!

Eilee, Me, Margie and Gary, Covent Garden, 2002

One busy Saturday, Rob and I caught up with Eilee and Margie (Day 66) and Garry when they were also in town. We met for a wander around Covent Garden before a nice lunch - at Brown's Brasserie, if I remember correctly. While we were at Covent Garden, I had spied these earrings but didn't buy them. Later that week after a busy day for me at the Library, and for Rob and Paulie exploring the sites, Rob arrived home with them as a gift for me - so thoughtful as ever!

Day 84 was another relaxing day. A good morning walk was followed by a lovely catch up with my darling neighbour Katie (Day 26), which was a highlight. I always leave KT feeling brighter; she's one of those people that spreads good energy. I'm so lucky to have her next right next door.

I'm working myself up for infusion number 5 - sounds a bit like a song... or a perfume! Because it's Easter Monday I didn't have my bloods done today but will do that first thing tomorrow, and am booked in for a later infusion at 2pm, to give them time to get the results back. Given I have some energy is back and other side effects have dissipated, I'm guessing my white blood cell count will be good enough for me to crack on with it. I do hope so. I'm eager to get it over and done with. I've started on the steroids today so am a bit hot and buzzy and I imagine it'll further interrupt my already disruptive sleep. Ready, set go...

Day 83: Silver Dove Fringes

Easter Sunday has been a lovely relaxing day. Bright, warm and sunny, it started early with the boys cracking open their Easter eggs, followed by a relaxing morning at home. For lunch we headed over to the Thompson's where Cazy cooked the most delicious greek lamb roast, while Rob's tart tartine and trifle were a hit. It felt so good to be out of the house for the first time in ages, and so lovely to be able to relax with these precious people.

I didn't think this treatment was making me shrink, but somehow I'm quickly becoming the shortest one in this family. Even Gracie's shoe size is two bigger than mine now.

Group selfie

Turban Sistas

Today I was wearing my Silver Dove Fringes. Rob bought these for me as a birthday present about a decade ago. I love the way they move, and they also remind me of one of the pairs I'd play with at Nanna's house, doubling the happiness. The doves seemed apropos today - all signs and symbols of peace seem to be needed more than ever.

Day 82: New York Deco Pearls

Lizzie and I being silly in Mid-town, NYC

9/11/2000 Staten Island Ferry,
Twin Towers in background

In September 2000, shortly after Rob and I got back together we went on our first overseas trip - to the US for the Am Pol Sci Conference in Washington D.C. It was pre-election season in the US - Gore v. Bush (even that seem so sane now!)- and Lizzie was there at the same time to connect with some of the key Democrat Party pollsters. This meant we were able to spend time together in Washington and then a few days in NYC.


In New York, Rob and I visited the Twin Towers. I remember the date distinctly because it was Dad's birthday - 11 September, one year to the day before the planes hit. This photo of me on the Staten Island Ferry was taken just after our visit there, with the towers standing tall in the background. It was eerie to realise this timing after the tragedy.

NYC earring shopping

Our New York hotel was on the Upper West Side, between Columbia University and Central Park with the tiniest of rooms. Around the corner there was a great bagel shop, and near that, a fabulous earring shop. After much deliberation, I selected today's Art Deco design pearls as a souvenir of that trip; it was the first time I think it registered with Rob that I had a serious earring obsession, and he took a photo of me making my selection.

C&B, The Birdcage, 2000

We left New York for London for a few days en route to Portgual (see Day 17). While we were in London visiting Cazy and Ben, the four of us went to one of the latest hit restaurants, The Birdcage, which is where I'm pretty sure these earrings had their first outing. A Guardian review at the time notes that the restaurant was expensive but "considering the labour, love, originality and Epicurean pleasure involved in each mouthful, it isn't unreasonable". I still remember the meal clearly, so I guess they were right. I'm not sure Rob and Ben have quite as clear memories after their Absinthe nightcaps!

Absinthe nightcaps

Our hangovers couldn't have been too bad as we headed out the following night for dinner with Pauline and John at another great restaurant of the moment, the Middle Eastern Momo's just off Regent street. We had a big night on the champagne with them - as the photo attests - and stumbled home so late we slept in the following morning and missed our flight to Portugal! 

J&P, R&L Momo's London, 2000

After some cross country excursions and great sleuthing by Cazy, we did eventually catch up with our travel companions in Northern Portugal, including many members of the golden web: Geoffrey, Vicki and David, Bretty, Anthony, Maddie and Bill, and Cazy and Ben. It was an amazing house in a strange land. We made the most of it and had a fabulous time.

The Portugal gang, 2000

Coogee, Easter Saturday

Day 82 and for some variety we decided to take a walk along the headland at South Coogee. It was a gorgeous morning and so refreshing to experience the sea air. Angus was my walking companion this morning and I now know more about Pokemon than is healthy for a grown woman.


I'm making progress with the puzzle - the beautiful girl is emerging from the fragments. But I'm almost done with the 'easy' bit and am feeling daunted by all the yellow and black still to come. Rob has taken James as his companion to the Belvoir theatre tonight to see Dog and Cat. I'd love to have gone but just don't have the energy. Angus and I are making our own fun at home, watching old episodes of Dr Who and reading Danny the Champion of the world - oh to write like Rolad Dahl - he's a magician with words..

Day 81: Cornflower blue crystal beads

It's been another beautiful sunny Autumn day today. It started with Rob dashing to the bakery for the obligatory hot cross buns, which were perfect with a strong cup of tea, followed by a lovely walk at Sydney Park with him, Molly, Angus and his sweet friend Noah. It was absolutely packed down there this morning, with everyone taking advantage of the wonderful Easter weather.

The Kelleher's arrived for a visit around lunch time. It was so lovely to see them - especially my handsome 6ft++ nephews Hugh and Charlie who always make me feel so small. Molly loved their attention too!

After they left I had a quiet afternoon with the puzzle, the toughest yet.... it's an exercise in patience: piece-by-piece, just like my day-by-day regime.

We had made plans for Deb and Mel to give James a pasta making lesson this afternoon, followed by dinner at their place, but as poor Mel is unwell, we've postponed. I'm sending get well wishes to her tonight. James and Rob tackled the task themselves, with a delicious outcome - spaghetti topped with a Prawn chilli sauce, more perfect Good Friday cuisine.

Day 81 I'm wearing a pair of cornflower blue bead earrings which Rob gave me as a birthday gift over 10 years ago. I love the colour of the beads, they're so pretty, but they are heavy so I don't wear them too often.

I'm feeling pretty well, just annoyed by the constantly running eyes and nose and continuing dry mouth. I am struggling not to anticipate the next infusion. I just need to stay in the minute and make the most of these good days before being tackled to the ground again.

Day 80: Mexican turquoise hooks

I like these days that end in a zero; they make me feel like I'm making progress. It seems like a short time ago that I was marking day 50, today it's Day 80 - only 48 more to go and I'm officially at the end of the chemo treatment.  I'm feeling pretty well. I'm tired and have watery eyes and a runny nose, both of which are part of the treatment. Otherwise I'm good.

It's been another stunning Sydney day. The light is shifting and the breeze is cool, so it feels like autumn but its sunny and warm. We enjoyed getting out into the sunshine for our morning walk around Sydney Park, and then I had another walk this afternoon down to the beauticians for mani/pedicure to keep my nails in shape - which are hanging in there, so far so good!

It was a calm day on the home front, with James still with his cousins and Angus having a catch up with another friend today. Things have picked up in terms of volume this evening with the arrival of Angus' friend Noah for a sleep over. I had a productive day, making some final touches to the chapter I'm writing with Rose and have sent that back to her. I've been so slow with it, but finishing that does give me a sense of achievement.



Today I found another old pair of earrings that has been keeping company with yesterday's pair at the bottom of the drawer. I bought these on Oxford Street in Paddington when James was a young baby and I was sleep deprived and wandering through the shops on a walk up from Potts Point. They have petite balls of of turquoise dotted around shapes suspended on chains. I've always loved turquoise which I why I think I bought them, in a daze. We're looking forward to a quiet easter weekend as far away from the traffic as possible.