Day 63: Paulie and Geeta's silver orbs

Wearing my silver orbs at P&G's with gorgeous nephews
big and small, Harry and Jai 2016

Geeta and Paulie Malaysia wedding 2008

Today I'm wearing a simple but lovely pair of silver orbs that my sweet brother Paulie and sister-in-law Geeta gave me for a birthday gift about two years ago. I chose them today because I knew I'd be seeing Paulie. He's such a sweetheart, he's been cooking for us, and hand delivered 6 meals this afternoon. What a boy! We're set for the week and Robbie can take a break. As I keep saying, its so wonderful to have him and Geets and Jai in town to have these spontaneous get togethers whenever we want.

Paul and Mum, train to Atherton Tablelands, 1975

I love my little 'bro - he's such a champ for surviving an upbringing with four older sisters. He put up with us - me in particular - babying him for years; between the ages of about two and four I cast him in mine and Lindy's imaginary games as my toddler, attempting to feed him grass, mud pies and other delights. I christened him 'baby jim' - a nick name I still often use in my head, if not out loud. He was such a cute little boy, it was impossible not to have him in our made up worlds.

Paulie looking overwhelmed with his female gang, North QLD 1975

This is my favourite ever photo of Paul - it sums up the sort of time we had at Nanna Clare's place as kids. These days, photos like this would have children's services knocking at your door but for us it was (fairly) harmless fun, even it did make some of our friends blanche. The flock wallpaper, his the Hawaiian shorts and the West Indies Cricket T-shirt with Viv Richards and the whole gang screams 1979!









Paulie seemed to thrive in the female environment and has some wonderful traits: gentleness, empathy and care and cooking. After having his first poem published in the Armidale Express when in primary school, Paul has emerged as a very talented creative writer. For the last decade he's been working in the radio and advertising industries in Melbourne. Now he's moved to Sydney - after Geeta took on an a great job with Booktopia - and is happily running his own business working on some amazing projects. Recently he's developed an incredible campaign with indigenous communities in the Northern Territory  to prevent road deaths, and with his long term mate Josh he's working with Qantas, including its last two inspired inflight safey videos.

This morning on Day 63 I headed back to Cancerworld at the Kinghorn for blood tests and a consultation with Rachel, my oncologist. She confirmed that my blood results were quite good; I'm a bit anaemic, vulnerable to viruses and my liver is taking a hit, but as far as thing go I'm travelling pretty well. She explained the potential side effects of the drug used in the next three infusions, docetaxel - the possibility of an immediate allergic reaction, less nausea but nerve sensation and possible damage, more hair loss (hang in there eyebrow/lashes), nail damage, mouth ulcers (go coconut oil, go), aching joints, tiredness, fluid retention, swollen ankles...what a joy this treatment is. I'm working hard on strengthening my 'living in the here and now' muscle.

50th anniversary celebrations, Feb 2014

For a welcome tonic after hearing about the next round of treatment, Rob and I headed for coffee with our family friend Fr Aloysious Mowe, currently director of the Australian Branch of the Jesuit Refugee Service, soon to be based in Rome in the same organisation but in a major international co-ordinating role. Aloysious became part of the golden web through Dad, who worked in a volunteer capacity with the JRS when living in Sydney. Dad and Aloysius formed a tight bond, which quickly extended to Mum. At a happy occasion during the last year of her life, Aloysious witnessed Mum and Dad renewing their vows at their 50th wedding anniversary. He also ministered to Mum in her last days in the most generous and gentle ways. I was with Mum one evening when Aloysious came to see her in hospital when she was in great distress, which gave way to a great sense of peace by the time he left. It was truly one of the most transformative encounters I've ever witnessed.

Aloysious also kindly agreed to come to Armidale to officiate at Mum's funeral, much to the chargrin of the local parish priest. It was a joyous celebration of her life, due in part to the sincerity and thoughtfulness with which Aloysious conducted the service (and also in part to Mum's forward planning, which was so spot on). After the funeral, George Souris, a former NSW Minster who was friend of Dad's and Rob's boss for a time, wrote to say it was one of the most beautiful funerals he'd ever attended, in his words "one fit for a Queen". He was right. When Dad was at his lowest point after Mum died, Aloysious took him on a trip to Hobart and reminded him of the life he still has to live.

He visited me too in hospital one evening recently when Ree and Andy were there and we had a great conversation about Judaism, Christianity and the meaning of life. After some quiet time on our own, he also left me feeling peaceful and calm.

Happily for all of us, Aloysious was also able to conduct the marriage service for Dad and Margie last November. His homily was a work of art; in it he was able to honour Mum and Margie's husband Norm, who died a decade a go, while also celebrating the commitment and future of the newly weds. It bought everyone such great joy and comfort.




We're all sad to see Aloysious leave Australia, but it's a great move for him. He's already taking bookings from the Chappell clan for future trips to Rome, starting with Cazy and Ben in July and Dad and Margie later in the year. 

Today, he passed on to fellow tea cup collector Rob two of his favourite cups that he can't carry with him to his new abode. You can see from Rob's face just how much he loves his new pieces. They spent half an hour comparing notes on their fine china purchases, where, when, who...it sounded familar! I came home to a parcel on my front verandah - gorgeous Art Nouveau colour-in plates sent from Catherine and Bart from Belgium. The second puzzle is almost done, and I can't wait to turn to the crocheting and colouring in these beautiful images. One of the good things about this treatment is not to be driven by work objectives, but these relaxing and stress free pursuit.